May I just weigh in in defense of Vice President Mike Pence? He’s taking a beating for his decision not to have a meal alone with a woman other than his wife or to attend an event “that features alcohol” without his wife present. The media has been abuzz with how silly he is. They have mocked him for using “The Billy Graham Rule.” This is a good time for Christians to think through where they stand and why.
Notice: He is not telling you what you can or can’t do. He’s just saying what he’s decided for himself. I see at least two good reasons for taking his stance—and I think the principle extends beyond what functions you attend and who you eat with to how transparent you are with your spouse in general.
First, transparency builds trust between you and your spouse.
Bob’s job sometimes required him to have a business lunch or coffee with a woman. I always appreciated that he would tell me, “I’m meeting so-and-so for lunch on Tuesday at Denny’s.” And then with a smile, “If someone tells you I was out with another woman, I want you to have heard it first from me.”
Put yourself in my shoes. How does your heart feel when your spouse is open with you like that? Does it reduce or increase trust? When you “report in,” or choose a high-traffic meeting place, or leave the door open, you build trust.
Second, if something is important, you protect it.
Dennis Rainey of Family Life Today points out that the Bible starts with a marriage and ends with a wedding. Marriages and weddings seem important to God. And don’t you protect the things that are important to you?
Take, for example, your pricey new cell phone. If you leave it on display in your car and then don’t lock the car, it may not get stolen. But are you going to chance it? Probably not. Because it is important to you, you protect it. Is your marriage more or less important than your cell phone?
So, am I telling you to personally adopt Mike Pence’s policies? Absolutely not. I am agreeing with his principles.
Figure out what you should do to protect your marriage and do it—even if people mock you or think you’re being silly.
Photo by Gage Skidmore, used with permission. It can be found here.
