Let me take you to Laborcita. It’s a neighborhood near Leon in the middle of Mexico. Almost all of the residents are very poor. Dirt roads are deeply rutted. Houses are made of concrete blocks with old shower curtains strung up for windbreaks or shade. Amenities are improvised—the coils from an old box spring mattress serve in place of a chain-link fence and a wall of bricks forms the back of an outdoor oven.
Inside you might find a mattress on the floor and a couple of folding chairs. The residents will insist that you sit while they stand.
The thing that is most haunting is not the poverty, but the faces—especially the faces of the young girls. They are 13, maybe 15 years old with a baby on their hip—their baby. Their husbands are two to three times their age. The girls rarely make eye contact. They stare vacantly into space or keep their eyes fixed on the ground. You keep asking yourself what is going on. Something is drastically wrong.
On Friday, my friend tells me. In this culture, if a man desires a girl, he waits until her parents are gone and then he grabs her and takes her for himself. She has no say in the matter. When her father returns, he doesn’t do anything. She is damaged goods. No one else will want her. They tell her that now she is “married.” No wonder the girls look down—ashamed. They have been violated and there is no one to protect them. No wonder they look hopeless. No one values them. They have no choice. There is no way out.
The Apostle Paul says that God has given marriage as a picture of the intimate relationship He desires with us. (Ephesians 5: 31-32) He could force us if He wanted to, but He chooses not to. He offers His love. He invites us into relationship with Him. If we refuse or delay, He waits and keeps on inviting—He keeps on loving. He gives us a choice. Love does not force. Our God never takes that which must be freely given.
